Bed Wetting?

[cherylstambaugh]

My niece is staying with us for most of the summer.  She has at her home had issues with wetting the bed regularly.  I know that she gets in trouble at home when she wets the bed, but I am not sure to what degree.
I am trying to take another approach and talk to her about choices and staying patient and loving.  I have though told her that she can not have some of the extras here (swimming and trampoline) till she can go without wetting in the bed (sort of like getting more priviledges as someone gets older, the more they handle responsibly, the more priviledges they get.) I don't want to be taking away regular things.  I do know that at her house, they don't let her have anything to drink after 4 pm. We eat dinner after that and the kids have snack around 7:30 or 8.  I don't want to have to restrict that.  She says that she does not get up and go just because she does not want to in the night.  She is 8 1/2.  Does anyone have any suggestions? My husband and I both have been praying for wisdom and insight as well.
Thank You!
Cheryl

[classic1]

Truthfully I am surprised and a little upset that she gets punished for wetting the bed.  If they don't give her liquids after 4 in the afternoon....then something is wrong with her body not her.
No one enjoys laying in their own urine so why would we get punished for it?
I would invest in a good bed liner and let her know how much she is loved.
Obviously you can't take her to the Dr. since you're not her parents....however, they do have some medication that helps children with this issue and helps to train their body.
Other than that, you could set up a positive reinforcement with a chart.  For each night that she successfully goes without an accident she can earn a star.  For 1 star she gets something....2 stars she earns something....it doesn't have to be big or cost alot of money but it will encourage her to try.
Hopefully she will feel empowered and can be encouraged instead of stressed and worried about wetting the bed and not getting a good nights sleep out of fear.

[cherylstambaugh]

Thank You Classic.  After my post yesterday, I read some articles from Focus on the Family.  I have been praying about this and seeking the wisdom of the Lord. 
My husband had similiar thoughts to mine that even taking away some activities was not how we wanted to have her spend her summer.
So after prayer and reading the articles, that confirmed some of what we were feeling.  We decided to just get some of the "Goodnight" underpants for at night.  Then if she does wet, it does not cause a mess and then the other kids wont even know.  She can sleep in their beds and feel more normal.  I don't want the focus to be on her bed wetting and I would like for her to not really have to think about it this summer.  I know that she will tell me if she does not go at night and when she does I think that I will give her a sticker or a piece of candy to kind of celebrate.  But other than that I don't even want to ask her if she did so that she knows that to us, it is no big deal.  I want her to just feel loved and accepted here.  Because if this is an emotional issue at the root, then our having fun and a positive summer will help and not hurt. 
Thank you for your encouraging words and I agree with you that punishment is not the way to go!  The article did suggest not to have drinks 2 hours prior to bed and that is easy because none of us really do.  After snack time, I can have all the kids put their cups in the dishwasher and not even have to say anything about it. It will happen naturally.  I will continue to pray and speak life and health over her while she is here and I know that this is nothing that God can not handle and best of all He loves her even more than I do. 

[cherylstambaugh]

I just wanted to update anyone reading this that our neice has been doing much better.  She only wet in the "GoodNight" pants twice in the past week.  I know that God is going to continue to help her and remove the bed wetting all together through love.
Thanks!
Cheryl